I want to preface this by saying that i am obviously drawing from personal experience , but this is a culmination of things i have seen or have been a part of , as a customer and as an employee. This is in no way an attack on , or reference to, a single business.
While there are things in this industry i dont know about, or am not 100% privy too, the people who are knee deep in those parts of the venture are missing out , or ignoring alot of things that those of us on the bottom floor (who are paying attention) get to witness. So this blog is going to be sort of an opinionated "How-to" guide, on avoiding those pitfalls Please overlook the arrogance, i have never owned a strip club and i am not assuming i can do your job better than you, this is just my diorama of things over looked.
1: The rules of the Club
Every club has a different set of rules, established by the club to avoid legal issues, but as soon as there are no cops looking, these rules are tossed out the window. Its like clubs are ignorant to the idea that these rules also can MAKE the club money and KEEP it there.
How?
Its a fairly easy concept... take TWENTY hot girls.. and a strict set of rules in a gorgeous club, with good music and liquor. If its in the right area, these girls will make money. The Club will make money.. it will be packed, and if the guys wanna get a handjob , it will be AFTER they get excited in the club , then go home to get one from their wife, or the dirty strip club up the street.
Now...Insert 2 ugly girls, lets not pretend like we dont know who these girls are, the ones who couldnt have gotten a job at hooters, and sure as hell shouldnt be in here naked.
Now.. we have 20 hot girls, who are obeying the rules and making money, and 2 less attractive girls who when they obey the rules, make LESS money.
So, to make the same amount of money the hotter girls are making, the 2 ugly girls break rules, they are touching and grinding and blowing or going home with guys in an effort to compete with a skill set that the more attractive girls dont want to and shouldnt have to exercise.
So some of the attractive girls quit, because the more attractive and classier girls arent going to break the rules and lower their own moral compass to compete with girls that shouldnt be there in the first place.
So now we have 16 hot girls and 4 girls who shouldnt be here... and some of the attractive girls start breaking the rules too , in an effort to keep their job and keep the money coming.
SO what do the less attractive girls do? They do same thing again,and lower their standards to compete with the lookers.
Wash , rinse , and repeat, enough and hire a couple girls just because a manager sees a chance to get a blow job and suddenly you have a club full of average, and below average girls in bathing suits.. who are doing everything shy of getting pregnant to make half the money they were making WHEN EVERYONE HAD TO FOLLOW THE RULES.
Basically.. .the premise is REEEEEEALLLY simple.. why pay a hot girl.. to look at her.. when you can pay and ugly girl to blow you while you look at the hot girl for free?
And in that situation.. if you were the hot girl.. why would you work there?
Then as a customer.. why would you go anywhere where there were no hot girls?
See what happened there?!?! WHY IS THIS SO HARD TO UNDERSTAND?!?
2. Management.... fucking management....
Under what premise did this word even find its way into some of these peoples portfolios? How is it that a strip club seems like the only place on the planet that you can be a shitty , always late for work, womanizing pervert one night, and everyones boss the next?
I also work at a consulting company that helps open and close businesses, helping people trim the fat and minimize loss in their day to day functions and the one thing i see more than anything else, is how management performance can make or break a business. That said, to this day i have not seen a strip club with a management structure that i thought would work past the end of the month, and most of the time i was right.
If i owned a strip club , the hierarchy would be as follows :
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A... SINGLE.. SOLITARY.. General Manager. Someone who reported directly to me, and who everyone else reported to. No micro managing, no skipping steps. My GM would be GOD and everyone from the owners, investors, and employees would answer directly to him or her as long as the doors were unlocked.
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Security manager. There would be ONE, he would report to the GM and his team would report to HIM, he would be responsible for all security matters.
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House mom... A FUCKING WOMAN.. no... i mean NOOOOOOOOOOO dancer on this PLANET is totally comfortable with these male house moms.. what the fuck are you thinking? And as far as a house moms job? Shes an employee, not a manager.. Her responsibilities should be placed accordingly.
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Bar Manager..and a head waitress... this should be pretty obvious.. and most clubs get this right.
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DJ... is a dj.. .NOT a manager.. NOT in control of my girls.. and these clubs who pay their djs some retarded insane amount of money per night to play whatever the hell they want to play.. and then harass the girls to give them an insane percentage of their tips, while ignoring their wants and needs...
Is crazy to me, if a dj is just going to come in and just get drunk and drugged up and ignore the girls.. then the question isnt just why are YOU paying them... but why are you expecting your girls to?
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There are other needs, on a club by club basis im sure but, here is the one i think most clubs are in desperate need of..
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Clubs need to have a single floor manager on a per night basis, she should be one of your dancers, she should be on salary because her job as a manager will supersede her duties as a dancer. She should be dressed similar to the dancers but but better. She should be one of the classiest and most attractive girls you have, she should be willing to be there early , and leave late, There should be ONE main person who occupies this job title, obviously she cant work every night, but their should be a single person who identifies with the job title. She should always be sober enough to do her job, always the best total package of uniform , makeup , hair and looks. She will be the one girls go to first with any problems, her job will be to make sure all of the girls are following the rules and making money.
Basically, there needs to be a girl, who is also a dancer, who you can trust, on your floor. As an acting manager.
To be continued...
